Me ? 2nd Pregnancy? Most Probably not...
Most couple will start planning for next child after their baby turn one or later when they are more ready. Same for us, very soon we will have to decide as our wtpg are 2 yrs old already. However, my dear hubby just happily announce that we will be planning for a "piglet", which mean by this year end, we have to success in producing! I keep silent as I have my own thought especially after my first pregnancy experience, though I dont wish to disappoint him.
Before my first pregnancy, I wish to bear 3 children. I dont find children annoying or are annoyed by children asking too many questions and attention. I love the children's laughter and voices to fill the house. I love the joy of having many children, even they acted coquettishly, to me, is melody.
However with the hubby level on family values, I really have no confidance to go through it again. My first pregnancy was not an happy one, in fact a tough one. It's really intimidating to think of repeating the nightmare again. Recalling the day I know I'm pregnant, the feeling is very magical, I can feel a special bond developing within my womb... cant really describe it but it a nice feeling and it came inside out. But this feeling was very soon overwhelmed by many anxieties, worries, cries and breakdown, one after another...
But acutally I'm still uncertain... I just have to get over the emotion and I can be a happy pregnant woman like any other mother... esp when see my frens all started their 2nd pregnancy. Definately I cant impulse over my frens are pregnant so I go along with the crowd, but bearing another child means another responsibility add on and I shdnt overload myself.
However, my hesitation can be lesser if the hubby can instil my type of mentality and give me the kind of support I needed... but, ...... sign.
Before my first pregnancy, I wish to bear 3 children. I dont find children annoying or are annoyed by children asking too many questions and attention. I love the children's laughter and voices to fill the house. I love the joy of having many children, even they acted coquettishly, to me, is melody.
However with the hubby level on family values, I really have no confidance to go through it again. My first pregnancy was not an happy one, in fact a tough one. It's really intimidating to think of repeating the nightmare again. Recalling the day I know I'm pregnant, the feeling is very magical, I can feel a special bond developing within my womb... cant really describe it but it a nice feeling and it came inside out. But this feeling was very soon overwhelmed by many anxieties, worries, cries and breakdown, one after another...
But acutally I'm still uncertain... I just have to get over the emotion and I can be a happy pregnant woman like any other mother... esp when see my frens all started their 2nd pregnancy. Definately I cant impulse over my frens are pregnant so I go along with the crowd, but bearing another child means another responsibility add on and I shdnt overload myself.
However, my hesitation can be lesser if the hubby can instil my type of mentality and give me the kind of support I needed... but, ...... sign.
Labels: motherhood
posted by wtpgRR at 6/16/2006 10:30:00 AM
2 Comments:
Hmmm...but at least you got two. I think that's perfect even if you really decide to stop. But looks like your hubby likes the idea.
Yes, just go with the flow. Don't worry too much now. Maybe things will change. What about a chat with your hubby about how you feel especially if he brings up the subject again. Will it help?
Im not very optimistic... maybe my previous experience had a very great impact on me...that time I told myself dont worry so much also as things may turn out not as bad as i thought but the end, indeed there are changes, changed to the worse and caught me surpised.
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